portrait picture for Deneill Pascarelli


A Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated for Deneill on Saturday April 14, 2018 at 1:00 at Assumption Church in Westport, CT.


Donations may be made in her honor to St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital www.stjude.org.

Deneill Pascarelli

Our mom was definitely the most awesome person I’ve ever met. Not many people could love so beautifully and deeply. In both directions, she was a force. If you were on her team, life was easy street. I

Growing up with Deneill as your mother was like winning mini-human Powerball. As children she would take us twins everywhere. We would play games like: let’s see who can get the most poison ivy. Or, at the beach, one of us run one way while the other runs the other. But somehow mom always kept us safe. I used to love motorcycles as a little boy and my mom would walk up to giant bearded Harley riders so I could see them. She wasn’t intimidated by anything her entire life, including stage 4 brain cancer.

Seeing my mother and father’s relationship was like watching alternate reality t.v. I say that because they were true partners in life. They were each other’s safe haven. Such an amazing bond of love that started as kids and only built stronger and stronger. Looking around, I haven’t seen something that sacred in any two other adults. They didn’t fight a lot and the few times they did, my mom always won.

Of the many ways our mom showered us with love, one was with food. She was an incredible cook. She made an eggplant parm that not one swanky New York City Italian restaurant could touch. But our mother’s table was always open, to all my friends and anyone who stopped by. She fed the landscapers, painters, plumbers, you name it. And she made incredible lamb chops…. for her dog ….because you know, that’s normal.

When things became tough with her illness, some of her language got mixed up. She would say words like “blue” or “grey” referring to a door or a light. But she never mixed up “Love you,” because it was so embedded in her. She was love. She is love.

Well mom, as 37-year-old men you were still keeping us safe. And we know you still are. Your life was a love letter to your family. To your soul mate and husband. To your sons (who you loved more than your soul mate husband). To your best friend and sister Joni. To your other beloved siblings Billy, Tony and Tina. To basically everyone you came in contact with.

We love you mom, always have, always will.

Purple. Grey. Religion.

Deneill is survived by her husband, Alphonse J. Pascarelli, Jr., sons; Alphonse, III, Justin William Pascarelli, and four siblings; William, Tony, Joni and Tina.

A Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated for Deneill on Saturday April 14, 2018 at 1:00 at Assumption Church in Westport, CT. Donations may be made in her honor to St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital www.stjude.org.



  1. Al I didn’t get the opportunity to Know Deneill. I feel sad for that because she sounds like she was very wonderful wonderful person. May God bless all of you with the loss of your wonderful wife. Our prayers will continue for you and your family. I love you

    April 6, 2018
    Raymond and Lori -
  • I remember cousin Deneill when she was born. She was the apple of her Daddy’s eye. Like her son mentioned, she was quiet, as I remember – but her laugh, and her mischief (something about a “cross country” trip ???) with her cousin Paula …. I remember visits between the Westport and Norwalk houses – and the swimming parties. I remember when she married Al and became one of the Pascarelli family. And the mother hen to the boys. I remember when they learned the word “cooperation”. They may not know but as I “patrolled” around midnight, I would often make a pass behind the Gallagher Park – and check Field St – just to make sure “all was well”. And a few times they caught me, as Deneill was walking the dog, or coming in or out of the driveway, or bringing in groceries. There are so many memories….. And although time and distance separated us, she was always in my prayers (along with the rest of the family.) And now- I FINALLY learned how to spell her name. God Bless the Saviano and Pascarelli family during this time. All my love ……

    April 6, 2018
    Cousin Wayne Henion -
  • The last time I saw Daniell was when we came to Westport for Father Fred’s wake. Daniell was loved by many and my mom, Lena Romano Peburn especially loved her. While I will not be able to come to Westport for the mass, all of her family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

    April 6, 2018
    Theresa Peburn Patella -
  • Much love and condolences to the Pascarelli and Saviano family. Y’all are in my thoughts and prayers.

    April 6, 2018
    Wendy Henion Ceccarelli -
  • Deneill had the most contagious smile of anybody I knew. Prayers are with the Pascarelli & Saviano families.

    April 6, 2018
    Vickie Henion -
  • My deepest condolences to u and your family. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

    April 6, 2018
    Joanne Sansabrino -
  • A beautiful lady inside and out…may Deneill rest in peace. I know the love shared as a family will be in your hearts forever and memories shared will be cherished forever. …Deepest sorrow Al, Alphie and Justin. Thoughts and prayers with you. Much love
    Linda & Taryn

    April 6, 2018
    Linda Kovacs -
  • Justo, you and your family always keep her memory alive. May GOD bless you all and May she rest in peace.

    April 6, 2018
    Roberto and Kelley -
  • To the family of lovely, and clearly SO loved, Deniell. I knew your Mom from school, mostly Bedford Jr., and always found her to be kind and funny, and original. I ran in to her in downtown Westport about 12-13 years ago, and we had a brief, sweet catch-up. She was clearly proud of her family. Condolences to you all from a friend from her school days.

    April 7, 2018
    Alison Shiboski -
  • Deneill was my friend at Kings Highway Elementary School and Bedford Junior High. Although I hadn’t seen her for years, I was deeply saddened to hear of Deneill’s passing. Back in the days when I knew Deneill, she was full of fun, a bit of mischief, and a sweetness and sensitivity that was so pure. Her easy and beautiful smile will always be warmly remembered by me. It is so lovely to read about Deneill from her sons’ perspective. It gave me a perfect portrait of the woman she became and the full live that she was gifted with. Also, although I don’t know you, Al–I am so very grateful for the love and life you shared with Deneill. I’m sorry that you didn’t have more time together– though it sounds as if the time that you did have with one another was quite special. May you, your sons, and the rest of Deneill’s family and close friends find peace in knowing Deneill’s love remains with you forever.

    April 7, 2018
    Katherine (Cappie) Campbell Perras -
  • Cousins Al, Alphie, Justin, Billy. Joni, Tony, and Tina:

    All my memories of Deneill were like her Mom (Aunt Joanie) a smile that lit up the room, always welcoming with food on the table, and laughter that warmed your heart and made you feel part of the family. Heaven received a special angel, rest in peace Deneill.

    God bless you all. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

    April 7, 2018
    Cousins: Tracy. Robert, Amanda, and Barbara Zemko -
  • I grew up with Deneill and as a child I lived nearby – I would walk down to her house and we would then walk to school together. Mom, Joan, always wanted to feed me as I came in the door. I remember stuffed breads and there was alway something cooking on the stove. And there were plenty of kids – Tina, Joanie, Billie and Tony – they had a lot of fun together. The family had a wonderful dog, Claudie, and the family let me adopt one of her many puppies. Deniell was a sweet and loving person and truly cared about people and had a special place in her heart for animals. She was smart – incredibly good at mathematics! I have many memories – these are just some. My deepest condolence to the entire family.
    Eve Ackerman-Healy

    April 7, 2018
    Eve Ackerman-Healy -
  • Al and Family-
    I’m so sorry to hear this.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family .

    April 7, 2018
    Sue Serricchio Goodman -
  • I am so sorry to hear about Denielle. She was a beautiful person. We had some great Christmas and Easters together. She was a wonderful mom to the boys Alfie and Justin. She was filled with love and spirit.. I wish I had stayed in touch. GOD BLESS HER AND THE FAMILY… Sherry Bonis -Ciskowski

    April 7, 2018
    sherry OSBORN -
  • What wonderful testimonials to Deneill’s life. The loving words written by her sons are a beautiful gift to all of us who were blessed to have known her. Those words had me laughing and crying at the same time. I am sure she is smiling. Whoever the Food Emporium guy is- we should collectively kick his butt. Deneill was my very first best friend. I met her when I missed the bus one morning on the way to kindergarten and I remembered seeing Deneill at a bus stop with her mom and somehow we found them. Deneill and I bonded that day and spent the rest of our childhood together. Each year at Kings Highway Deneill and I would be frantic with worry that we would end up in separate classes but somehow, fate (or perhaps the guidance counselors) knew that we were a pair. We had to be together. That’s just the way it was. Her home was my home. A home with lots of family and friends coming and going. Smoke in the air, delicious Italian food cooking on the stove and Johnny Cash playing on the record player. In 4th grade, our friend Darielle moved to Westport and our twosome became three. Three best friends together. We made it work. Not too long ago Darielle said to me that we should call up Deneill and the three of us should get together. I thought it was a great idea. I am saddened that we didn’t do it. I am saddened that I didn’t know my childhood friend had brain cancer or that she lived just the next town over. Deneill and I only saw each other a handful of times in the past 40 years. Always she would share with me her stories of her life with Al and her twin boys now men. Clearly, her love for her family was the essence of who she was. I will cherish the memories of all the times we spent together ( Wayne, dare I confess that I drove Deneill and Paula to the bus station for their “cross country’ adventure? A story for another time) When I think about Deneill I think of this saying “Friends are like angels, just because you don’t see them, doesn’t mean they are not there.” I will think of her smile, I will miss her . She will always be my very first, best friend.
    May God bless and comfort your family and friends.

    April 7, 2018
    Nancy Hartsig Dennert -
  • Al & family,
    I’m so sorry to hear about Deneill. She was a genuine, sweet, and so kind. I won’t forget the times we spoke and how she greeted you with a smile. Her spirit was pure and beautiful. I’d tell her that she had the most beautiful voice. She’d laugh.I kept my vm of her when she called me when my mom Barbara passed because she was always kind hearted. She was a comfort when my mom passed and spoke of the good memories. I listened to it a few days ago and thought of her.
    I didn’t know she was Ill and I’m so sorry. I found out last night and I could feel her spirit and hear her say that it was okay. I know she’s with Aunt Joanie. I went to the monastery today and left flowers for the monks in her memory. On my way there I saw a red cardinal fly across my path. I know it was her. Grateful that she was our cousin. Love and prayers to you, your sons, family friends and my cousins. I love you Deneill. God bless you all.

    April 8, 2018
    Gigi -
  • I’ve known the Pascarelli’s since before I can remember. (33+ years for those of you that are counting) I met Alphie and Justin in kindergarten and we instantly became friends. I spent countless hours at their house growing up and when I wasn’t there they were at mine. Needless to say when you spend that amount of time with anyone you get to know them and especially their family. Mrs. and Mr. Pascarelli were basically like a second set of parents to me. Always making you feel welcome and part of the family.

    Other than my own parents I can honestly say I don’t know too many that made it a point to be so involved in their children’s lives. They made it to every baseball/basketball game we had growing up. I mean they were just always there, without question, no matter what was going on in their lives. I don’t think many kids can make that claim and we were truly lucky to have such great parents to mold us into the men we have become today.

    As far as Mrs. Pascarelli goes I can sum up what kind of person she was with a single childhood memory. As Alphie stated the Pascarelli’s always had an open door policy for any of their boys friends. So it was not uncommon that I would stop over there after school unannounced. One day I stopped over to see Justin and Alphie and although I should have knocked I opened the front door (because they made their home feel like YOUR home) and to my surprise Mrs. Pascarelli was up the stairs in a t-shirt and her underwear. Now as awkward and mortifiying as this must have been for her I will never forget her response! She laughed and said, “Well Tom, you really caught me with my pants down here.” A strange thing to recollect I suppose, but I think it speaks volumes to who Mrs. Pascarelli was as a person. Someone that could make light of an akward situation and somehow STILL make you feel comfortable and welcome. I honestly don’t think there are many (if ANY) people in this world that could pull that off.

    She truly had an astounding sense of humor. And that was the thing that made it so easy! Mrs. Pascarelli had THE most contagious laugh. The kind that could make you forget about everything going on around you and you couldn’t help but laugh/smile in return. She was such a fierce protector of her children and showered them (and their friends/ME) with so much love and it was just something that came naturally to her. Like Alph said, she IS/WAS love and I say that simply by being friends with her sons. She loved them (and Mr. Pascarelli) more than anything, but that love extended as far as the eye could see. (except for that guy at the Food Emporium, screw that guy!)

    Although I didn’t get a chance to see Mrs. Pascarelli before she passed I will always remember her for being that unique, once in a lifetime special person. Someone that loved her husband more than anything in the world and her sons more than words can possibly describe. I say that because over 33+ years I experienced it first hand.

    Other than my own parents I don’t think I’ve ever seen two people more in love with each other than Mr. and Mrs. Pascarelli. You couldn’t help but notice it every time you were around them. It was contagious! Over the years and through countless memories there is no doubt that she loved her boys just much if not more.

    My heart goes out to the Pascarelli family during this time as they have suffered such a great and irreplaceable loss. Please understand that as much as you already know she touched your lives, she touched so many more in so many ways. Mine especially. Mrs. Pascarelli really was the best and will be truly and sorely missed by all.

    -Tom “TK” O’Brien Jr.-

    April 8, 2018
    Tom “TK” O’Brien Jr. -
  • Dearest Saviano and Pascarelli Families,
    I am very saddened to hear about Cousin Deneill, my thoughts and prayers are with y’all in this time of need.
    About 4 years ago, I came up from Virginia with Dad and “baby” Serenity. On our way to dinner dad had drove by their house to “check” up on. Luckily Deneill was just getting home, and invited us in for drinks, and donuts. Her cheerfulness, and welcoming spirit always made me feel very comfortable. Gone but definitely won’t be forgotten.
    Much love
    Cousin Jenny

    April 8, 2018
    Cousin Jenny (Henion) Riddle and family -
  • Deneill was truly one of the nicest people I have ever know. When we were at Bedford Junior High in Westport. we had gym class together. One day she had the idea that we should skip gym and we walked in our ugly red gymsuits down Riverside Ave. where they were building that 4 or 5 story office building at the end of Riverside. We unsnapped our gymsuits to show what little cleavage 7th graders had in those days and strutted back and forth in front of the construction workers. They whistled at us and we giggled all the way back to Bedford, where Mrs. Flamio gave us hell for skipping the cross country. It was one of my fondest memories of junior high and I will always remember Deneill’s part in it. She was definitely one of a kind. May your family find peace in the happy memories she created for everyone.

    April 8, 2018
    Nancy (Davis) Shwartz -
  • My deepest sympathies to the Pascarelli and Saviano families and all of Deneill’s many friends. My heart is filled with love for a childhood bestie that has passed on far too young. Deneill and I became friends when my family moved to Westport when we were in the 5th grade (Yes, Nancy, I broke up your twosome! But we managed to make the threesone work!) Somehow I think our unusual first names gave us an instant bonding (and a sense of humor!) Deneill and I remained friends through Bedford Junior High and Staples High School. So many memories flooding my mind right now but the greatest of all is I remember when she met what turned out to be the love of her life, Al Pascarelli!
    Unfortunately our lives went in different directions and we lost contact and I moved south 20+ years ago. I have so many fond memories of childhood with Deneill and her family…one of many being the love, warmth, and sense of family in the Saviano house. My second home…
    ❤️ RIP sweet old friend xo
    My love to all of the family

    April 8, 2018
    Darielle Ross -
  • I am so sad that my so kind and beautiful cousin is not here to listen to. The memeries i have of her give me strength and her words taught me justice. Deneill mattered and made you a better person…yes she put me on her team

    April 9, 2018
    Paula g -
  • Words cannot express the way I feel about Deneill she was a beautiful special person inside and out. She loved her boys and it showed
    She and Al had a great marriage from a young age till now. I will never forget the way she and Al took care of my Mom and Dad when they were ill. She was a very generous loving person who will be missed by many. She will never be forgotten and she had a very strong faith.
    I will pray that God will give you strength to carry on . You know Deneill would want it that way. We have all the great memories that we
    shared with your family and ours. I can’t be there for the Memorial Mass but will be thinking of your family at this sad time.
    My Love to all of You. Phyllis and Tom

    April 10, 2018
    Phyllis Moyer -
  • My heart hurts with the loss of my cousin Deneill. She was one of the bright lights of the family. So loving, caring and thoughtful. So many memories of her. One was way back, when she was just a little girl, at the beach. A lady came up to me while I was holding her, and asked if she was my beautiful baby girl. (I was twelve) I laughed looked at Joanie and said …of course. As she grew up, it was amazing to see her blossom into the strong, spiritual, kind, loving woman, wife and best of all “Mom” that she became. Always welcoming with that wonderful smile on her face and that mischief glint in her eye. (Deneill…you are my favorite. sh don’t tell little Joni)
    Our condolences and love go out to Al, Alphie, Justin and the rest of the Pascarelli family. Special hugs with much sadness and a heavy heart goes to Cousins Tina, Billy, Joni, Tony and families.

    April 10, 2018
    Cousin Paula, Jimmy, Bobby, Dawn, Benny and Tyler -
  • Heartwarming account of who surely seemed to be a wonderful mom. Really touching. Praying you and your family find joy in the days to come.

    April 10, 2018
    Alvin -
  • AL , Al Jr and Justin – I am so deeply sorry for your loss. Deneill was a very special person , a wonderful mom , a wonderful wife and a loving person. Although the circumstances which lead to meeting Deneill and her loving family were not ideal , I believe I was blessed having the opportunity to get to know each one of you. The love , respect and honor shown to Deneill during each visit was not only evident but palpable. Deneill was strong , confident , funny , loving , and displayed such courage during the most trying times. She loved her boys ( all 3 of her guys) as much if not more than they loved and adored her – that is quite a bit.
    I will always wear ” faith” on my left wrist , near my heart in memory of my extended Italian / Connecticut family, remembering Deneill and each of you . I have faith that Deniell is in Heaven looking down on her family with the same smile she always had – remember that every single day guys . God bless you – Love and hugs Rosemary

    April 10, 2018
    Rosemary Ketring -
  • al, justin and alfie, our sincerest condolences to you and all the family on your loss. We all have many wonderful memories. May Deneille rest in peace. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all at this very difficult time. Love to all.

    April 11, 2018
    Ray & Pat Emond -
  • To Al, Justin and Alfie and the entire family:
    I am sending everyone in the family my love and prayers….as you may remember I lived upstairs from you on Riverside Avenue with my son Vincent Penna for a few years and we had a wonderful relationship with you and your mom, dad and all the family. I had no idea that Deneille was dealing with such a terrible illness. Deneille was fun and a good friend to me and my son. Please extend my sympathy to all your extended family. Regards, Ann Marie (Penna) Breisler Norwalk, CT

    April 11, 2018
    Ann Marie Breisler -
  • My thoughts and prayers and deepest condolences being sent to Al, Justin and Al. Fond memories on the baseball field. May she truly rest in peace and give you guys the strength to carry on.

    April 12, 2018
    Steve Brueski -
  • Al, Alphie, Justin and all of the Saviano family,
    Our thoughts and prayers are with all of you. Rest In Peace Deneill
    Gail and Bob Meissner

    April 15, 2018
    Gail Meissner -
  • Dear Justin,
    We are thinking of you and your beautiful mom in heaven today. I will always remember the many things you , your dad , mom and Alphie did to comfort my own mother and father when we lost Steve. Your mom specifically never forgot about steve , leaving flowers at the Cemetary on mother’s day and sending thoughtful words of remembrance on holidays and Christmas. Her kindness was beyond genuine and sincere ; it helped us begin to heal. We will continue to pray for your healing and cherish your moms memory forever. God bless you.

    Cheryl Stranieri

    May 13, 2018
    Cheryl -
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